2017 in Retrospect
Dec. 30th, 2017 08:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dracoqueen22 Now that the year is over, it's time to look back and see what all I've accomplished.
I didn't actually set any goals for 2017 because I wasn't in a very good place back when 2017 started. I was feeling very low, both about myself and my abilities, and I could barely keep myself together.
Despite the garbage fire of a year 2017 has been all around the world, in my little universe, it's actually gotten a wee bit better. I finally found a full-time job with both benefits and retirement savings. Thanks to that, I was able to get some stability in my schedule and in my funds.
I was also able to finally go to the doctor and I acquired medicine to help manage my depression and anxiety, which I'm telling you, has made a world of difference. It feels like I'm no longer living under a dark cloud. I can actually enjoy life. I have energy. I'm not terrified of the world. It's a miracle. I could cry over how much better I feel.
Family life has still been difficult. New job means new money, but I'm still running short. Got credit card debt that pretty much isn't mine, but I doubt I'm going to get my money back for it, so paying it back falls on me. I briefly reopened commissions to help with that and got a pretty good crop this time.
Overall, I posted 39 new fics, and finished 2 fics, and updated one ongoing fic that needed updating. That's a lot more ficcage than I thought myself capable, but man, writing returned with a vengeance once I got my mental illness under control. I'm also happy that a lot of those fics include me finishing long-standing WIPs that needed finishing, like Truth in Advertising, the last piece of Mastermind, etc. I also got to write a lot of pairings I love and tried out some new fun ones.
I didn't do anything original in 2017, mostly because I didn't see a point in it. People don't seem to be interested in original things anymore. I made the decision that I would set aside my original works. I took down everything I had for sale. I took down my website. I deleted my original fics from AO3. It was too heart-breaking to put my time and effort into these works and have no one read them. It was better to not try than to be disappointed, at least for 2017. Maybe they actually suck? Maybe they need a lot of work? I don't know because I never got any kind of feedback, so I'm left assuming they were just awful.
Maybe it'll be different in 2018. I might try again. Who knows. Maybe I'll wait another five years until my skills are better and I have something worth selling. This is one thing I didn't quite solve in 2017. But it's okay to save some thoughts for 2018, I think. ^_^
Overall, I end 2017 a hundred times more hopeful than I began it. Things are not perfect, and the world is a pitfire of awful around me, but in my tiny little corner, things are improving and that's something to be grateful for.
I didn't actually set any goals for 2017 because I wasn't in a very good place back when 2017 started. I was feeling very low, both about myself and my abilities, and I could barely keep myself together.
Despite the garbage fire of a year 2017 has been all around the world, in my little universe, it's actually gotten a wee bit better. I finally found a full-time job with both benefits and retirement savings. Thanks to that, I was able to get some stability in my schedule and in my funds.
I was also able to finally go to the doctor and I acquired medicine to help manage my depression and anxiety, which I'm telling you, has made a world of difference. It feels like I'm no longer living under a dark cloud. I can actually enjoy life. I have energy. I'm not terrified of the world. It's a miracle. I could cry over how much better I feel.
Family life has still been difficult. New job means new money, but I'm still running short. Got credit card debt that pretty much isn't mine, but I doubt I'm going to get my money back for it, so paying it back falls on me. I briefly reopened commissions to help with that and got a pretty good crop this time.
Overall, I posted 39 new fics, and finished 2 fics, and updated one ongoing fic that needed updating. That's a lot more ficcage than I thought myself capable, but man, writing returned with a vengeance once I got my mental illness under control. I'm also happy that a lot of those fics include me finishing long-standing WIPs that needed finishing, like Truth in Advertising, the last piece of Mastermind, etc. I also got to write a lot of pairings I love and tried out some new fun ones.
I didn't do anything original in 2017, mostly because I didn't see a point in it. People don't seem to be interested in original things anymore. I made the decision that I would set aside my original works. I took down everything I had for sale. I took down my website. I deleted my original fics from AO3. It was too heart-breaking to put my time and effort into these works and have no one read them. It was better to not try than to be disappointed, at least for 2017. Maybe they actually suck? Maybe they need a lot of work? I don't know because I never got any kind of feedback, so I'm left assuming they were just awful.
Maybe it'll be different in 2018. I might try again. Who knows. Maybe I'll wait another five years until my skills are better and I have something worth selling. This is one thing I didn't quite solve in 2017. But it's okay to save some thoughts for 2018, I think. ^_^
Overall, I end 2017 a hundred times more hopeful than I began it. Things are not perfect, and the world is a pitfire of awful around me, but in my tiny little corner, things are improving and that's something to be grateful for.
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Date: 2018-01-04 03:14 am (UTC)