[CR] A Public Folly
Nov. 10th, 2018 11:42 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dracoqueen22Title: A Public Folly
Universe: Critical Role, Campaign Two, Episode 23, post Labenda
Characters: Mollymauk Tealeaf, Yasha, Fjord, Jester Lavorre, Caleb Widogast, Nott the Brave
Rating: K+
No warnings.
Description: Truth will out, as it always does, and everyone has a thing or two to say about the not-so-secret couple in the Mighty Nein.
It’s not cold, per se, but it’s definitely on the lower end of chilly. Mollymauk tucks his tapestry tighter over his shoulders, and laments the fact he’d been smart enough to purchase tents and build this divine cover for their wagon… but not smart enough to buy warmer clothing. But then, what other clothing could he have found as glorious as this?
Not much.
He adjusts his hold on the reins, the horses steadily clopping forward. Fjord and Beau ride ahead with Yasha alongside, holding WC’s reins. Behind him, Caleb focuses on that strange stone he’s been concentrating on for the past few days, and Nott is once again tempting fate by trying to make acid. Kiri’s napping and Jester…
Jester is climbing into the seat beside Molly with a grin on her face that doesn’t bode well for his sanity. Not that he’s all too sane to begin with.
“So!” Her tone is absurdly cheerful for the cold. Then again, she has expressed a resistance to it time and time again. She bobs toward him, brushing their shoulders. “What’s it like?”
Molly blinks. “You’re going to have to be a bit more specific, darling,” he drawls. This seems to be Jester’s mode of operation, he’s noticed. She often leaps right into a conversation as though she’s already started it in her head, and hasn’t realized she never spoke aloud.
“Being with Fjord, duh.” Jester rolls her eyes.
Having always had a casual relationship with the truth when it’s not so important, Molly gives no sign that her words shoot straight to his heart. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Jester narrows her eyes at him. “You’re lying!”
“You’re lying!” Kiri chirps behind her.
Ah, yes. The ever present commentary from the peanut gallery. This ought to be interesting.
“I’m not stupid. Or deaf,” Jester continues. She leans in and half-whispers, “You guys aren’t very quiet, just so you know.”
Molly barks a laugh before he can stop himself. “He’s going to be so embarrassed.” He digs into his pocket, glad he’s started following suit with Beau and keeping a few pieces of bacon stashed inside.
“I know!” Jester giggles and leans against his side, which Molly has to admit, is rather welcome right now. It’s fucking cold out here. “And then he’s going to blush, and he’s super-cute when he does that. Have you ever seen it?”
Molly grins around a bite of bacon.
Jester smacks her forehead with her palm. “What am I thinking, of course you have.” She eyes his bacon before leaning back and digging out a sad pastry from what seems to be an endless supply. “What makes him blush? You can tell me. I won’t tell anyone. Traveler’s promise.”
“Can. Not so sure I should,” Molly says.
He takes a few moments, chews and swallows, watches the road in front of them, the steady clop-clop-clop of the horses. Beau’s just elbowed Fjord in the side for some reason. Fjord’s rubbing over his armor because it probably hurt.
“By the way, very impressed,” Molly says as he tucks the bacon back into his pocket. “Kind of thought you’d be a little more… well...” He tilts his head left to right, makes the jewelry jingle, hoping he doesn’t have to spell it out. It’s awkward enough as it is.
“Oh.” Jester nibbles on the pastry, magically mended to something far less rotten. “Well… he’s Fjord, and you’re you, and yeah, okay, I’m pretty jealous, but I’m not mad, Molly.”
Molly rolls his shoulders, tries to ease the strain in his muscles. It’s hard work, steering horses. Harder still when your seat has got all the comfort of a rough, wooden board. Probably because it is one.
“Ah,” he says. “Good to know then. So instead you’re supportive, I take it?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” She blinks up at him, genuinely confused if Molly has to guess, and well, she’s got him there.
Molly supposes Jester only gets jealous if the interest comes from outside the Mighty Nein.
“No reason.”
“You guys aren’t very quiet, just so you know,” Kiri pipes up, following it with a coo and chirp as she bundles down into the warm clothes Jester bought her.
Behind them, Caleb has moved from that weird rock to one of his books, lips muttering to himself as he reads. Nott’s intently focused on her vial, and that she hasn’t spilled yet is something of a miracle. Ahead of them, Beau and Fjord have moved a bit further forward. Yasha’s slowed down, but Molly’s not worried. She probably found a pretty flower or something.
She’ll catch up. She always does.
“So,” Jester says, dragging out the vowel. “Come on. Tell me.” She clutches his arm, getting pastry icing all over his tapestry.
It’ll take ages – or a very heavy downpour – for that to wash out.
Molly lifts his eyebrows and leans in close, without taking his eyes from the road. “It’s magical,” he says.
“Really?” Jester jumps up, and Molly has to move back at the last second to avoid getting clipped by a shoulder to the jaw. “I knew it!” She pumps a fist into the air.
Molly chuckles and leans back. “No, I’m just fucking with you,” he says. “It’s sex, sweetheart. It’s dirty and wet and messy and--”
“--sounds pretty fucking magical to me,” Jester interjects with a knowing look. She pops the rest of the pastry into her mouth and stares at her sticky fingers.
“Right. Forgot who I was talking to for a second there.” Sometimes, Jester really throws him for a loop. He peers at her. “Seriously? Not at all upset?”
“Nope!” She pops the syllable and licks her lips clean before starting to work on her fingers. “Tell me more then. Like… does he taste like the ocean?”
Molly snorts. “Usually semen does.”
“Not always,” Jester drawls with a roll of her eyes. “There are different flavors.”
“Got me there. And I really don’t want to know how you know that.” Molly glances over his shoulder. Yasha’s caught back up, a small smile on her face as she twirls a petite flower in her fingers.
Good for her.
Jester bobs a little in the seat and leans forward, gripping the forward edge. “It’s kind of obvious, isn’t it?”
“Which is why I don’t want to know.”
“You’re avoiding my question, Mollymauk,” Jester informs him, her tone a mixture of singsong and rebuke, somehow both at once.
Ahead of them, Beau makes a wild swing at Fjord who steers his horse out of the way, their laughter carrying back. Beau attempts to kick him, but he’s out of reach. Fjord holds up a hand, and Beau shakes her head, hissing at him.
Molly would give anything to be a fly buzzing in the middle of that conversation.
“It’s not really a question, is it?” Molly asks absently. “It’s more of an idle curiosity.”
“It’s a question,” Jester insists, and pokes him in the shoulder, though he barely feels it through the thickness of the tapestry. “A very important one.”
“It’s magical!” Kiri peeps and climbs onto the seat, wriggling between them with all the determination a tiny bird child can muster. Which is quite a lot.
“See! Even Kiri agrees with me, don’t you, Kiri?” Jester sweeps Kiri into a hug, and the kinku squeaks with surprise, feathers floofing out.
“Oh, gods. She’s going to remember every bit of this conversation, isn’t she?” Molly groans. He doesn’t embarrass easily, but Kiri has such a talent for repeating the wrong thing at the absolute wrong moment. Something he enjoys seeing others suffer for, but not so much himself.
Jester laughs. "Of course she is."
"Yes, I am very sweet," Kiri parrots.
Molly sighs and gathers up the reins, handing them in Jester's direction. "Why don't you and Kiri take the reins for a bit? Give me a chance to take a breather."
"Really?" Jester pops up with glee and almost snatches the reins out of his hands. "Come here, Kiri. Let me show you how to drive a cart."
"It's magical!" Kiri declares as she ducks under Jester's arm and coos excitedly.
Molly stands up, with care since the road is still rather bumpy, and straddles the seat to step back into the cart. "Good girl." He kisses the top of Jester's head. "Have fun now."
He looks up, catches Yasha's attention, and gestures her over, pointing at the extra horse in her possession. Yasha nods and trots over. Molly picks his way through the cart to the lip on Yasha's side, shrugging off the tapestry as he goes.
"Hold on to this for me, Mr. Caleb," he says as he dumps the tapestry on top of Caleb's head.
He doesn't wait for a reply, but leaps over the edge onto WC's saddle once the horse is close enough. The tip of his foot catches on the cart, but he manages not to take an embarrassing face-first tumble into the hoof-stirred mud. Small favors.
Yasha hands him the reins once he steadies himself, and they exchange a smile. Molly glances back at Caleb to see what's become of his tapestry, but the wizard's only stirred enough to tuck the folds of it tighter around his body.
Nott's cleaned up her chemistry set and has scooched closer. She's got a bundle of trail rations in her hands, and she's trying to feed them to Caleb. He eats absently, opening his mouth when she presses something to his lips, but otherwise not fully engaging in it. It was weird at first, but Molly's gotten used to the way Caleb gets completely enraptured by his books.
It's pretty adorable.
"Everything okay?" Yasha asks as Molly situates himself and sets his horse to match Yasha's pace.
"Oh, yeah. Just needed a break, you know." He squirms pointedly. "Saddle is only slightly more comfortable than wood."
Yasha nods slowly. "And doesn't come with, uh, probing questions about your sex life?"
"That, too."
They laugh. Well, Molly does. Yasha has more of a quiet chuckle, but her eyes sparkle, and the corners of her mouth lift up, and it's really quite enchanting.
"Not that I've ever been shy about my sex life, mind," Molly says as looks over the landscape, keeping a watchful eye for bandits or brigands or possibly anything of worth.
"But this is different," Yasha says.
Mollymauk tilts his head. "Well. It's. Hm." He considers. "You may be right." He squints as he runs a gamut of possibilities before he smacks the heel of his palm against his forehead. "What am I saying? Of course, you're right. Yasha is always right. It's one of your many, many charms, my dear."
"Not always," Yasha says, quietly, barely audible over the horses.
Molly tips his head in deference. "Often enough."
Yasha sighs and adjusts her grip on the reins. Toilet gives a little nicker, so she pats her on the mane. "Well, Molly... are you happy?"
"Why wouldn't I be?" It's an odd echo of Jester's reply earlier, only his is far less genuine.
Yasha gives him a knowing look, the one that seems to peer straight into his soul at times. His Molly-soul, not his whoever he used to be soul. "You know what I mean."
Molly scrubs the back of his head. "Well, you know, it's easy. There aren't any expectations from him. I can be me, be myself, and it's not an issue. Which is pretty weird, let me tell you. Humans usually have these... expectations about monogamy."
"Fjord's not all human."
"Yeah, but he was raised human. That's the difference." Molly waggles a finger at her. "Anyway, yeah. So there's that. And I think that's a good thing, a nice thing. So. I guess I am. Happy, that is."
Yasha smiles at him, soft and warm. "I'm glad."
"Me, too."
Yasha pauses and takes in a slow breath. "Well, you know, also I'm glad. Because I never know when I have to, you know, go away again. And I just want to make sure that you... you have someone looking out for you. Because you can be terrible, sometimes, at taking care of yourself."
Molly chuckles. "Yes, I suppose I can be. I'll try to be better though. In the future. As best as I can be."
"That's all I want. I mean, I know we don't know what's going to happen, and things happen..." She pauses, a dark shadow entering her eyes, her hands tightening on the reins. "Things happen we can't prevent. But we can try, right?."
"We can certainly try," Molly agrees and gestures toward the open countryside to their right. "We can also try and keep an eye on our surroundings."
Yasha chuckles. "Yes. That we can do."
~
Ten minutes is far too long for Beau to be quiet. She'd ridden up next to him, and Fjord's been waiting for her to talk. Her face has gone through a series of expressions he can't begin to identify, and he's a bit concerned as to what nonsense is going to come out of her mouth. Or what weird advice she's going to need.
Finally, Beau clears her throat, shifts in the saddle, and says, "So." She pops the word, purses her lips together, gives him a sidelong look. "You and Molly."
Fjord groans internally. This is not the conversation he wants to have right now.
"Beau," he starts, "I really don't think--"
"Just answer the question, man," Beau says and holds up her hands, nearly dropping her reins. "I'm not here to judge." She jiggles her shoulders. "Okay, maybe I'm judging a little, but only because it's Molly." She shakes a finger at him.
Fjord sighs.
In the long run, this will be less painful if he just goes for the truth now. "Yes," he says.
"I fucking knew it." Beau pumps a fist in the air, and her horse whinnies. She has to pat her neck to get her to calm down.
"You happy?" Fjord grunts.
"Actually? Yeah." Beau grins, and there's something sharkish in the gleam of her teeth.
Fjord twists his jaw. "Feel better now? Feel like the answer solved something?"
"Well, it won me five gold so..." Beau winks. "You know, there's that."
Fjord's eyes widen. "You bet on me!?" he demands, and he's not sure if he's offended.
No. He's sure. He's pretty damn offended. He's not particularly fond of people making jokes on his behalf.
"Only a little one." Beau pinches her fingers to demonstrate.
"With who?" he demands.
"Jester." Beau grins as if she's proud of herself. "She thought you'd be too embarrassed to admit it."
Fjord whips around in the saddle, glaring at the cart behind them, where Jester's sitting next to Molly and chattering about something. "That little..!" He huffs. There will be retribution. Swift and fierce.
"So..." Beau rides a bit closer and clears her throat again. "What's that like anyway?"
Fjord stares at her. He bounces a little in the saddle and has to glance ahead to make sure there aren't any catches in the road.
"No, wait," Beau blurts out, and shakes her hands. "Don't tell me. I don't wanna know. That's two too many dicks in that mental image."
Fjord snorts a laugh before he can help himself. Beau looks absolutely distraught. Her nose wrinkles.
"You sure?" he asks, feeling like it's his turn to make someone here uncomfortable. "Because you know, he does this thing with his--"
"Ugh. No. Stop!" Beau jerks an elbow toward him, faster than he can see or react.
Fjord grunts as it slams into his side, felt even through the thickness of his armor. "Ow."
"Just making sure you shut up now."
"Maybe you ought not be asking questions you don't want to know the answers to then," Fjord says with lifted eyebrows.
"Yeah. I see your point." Beau gives him a crooked grin. "But I guess... congratulations are in order? I mean, it's still Molly so I don't know how lucky that makes you."
Fjord sighs. “Beau...”
She grins and socks him on the shoulder. “Just kidding! Mostly.”
Ow.
Fjord bears it this time, though his arm radiates with pain, and his hand goes a little numb for a second. “You know, you don’t have to keep pretending,” he says. “I know you actually like Molly.”
“Who’s pretending?” Beau goes stiff in the saddle, abruptly upright and narrow-eyed. “He’s an annoying asshole. But then so am I. It works out.”
Sometimes, Fjord can’t tell when Beau’s serious and when she’s not. It’s certainly a work in progress.
“Can you just get the teasing over with so we can move on already?” he prompts, eyes planted on the endless, empty horizon. Hupperdook needs to be in front of them like right now so he can escape from this conversation.
Beau sucks air through her teeth. “Uh.” She scratches her chin. “Look, man, I’m sorry. Like, I want to tease you, but now I feel like I shouldn’t, because I’m sensing a little tension, so no. Not gonna tease you.” She holds up her hands before wrapping them back around the reins. “You’re happy. I guess he’s happy. That’s all that matters.”
Fjord blinks.
“I… thank you, Beau. That’s mighty good of you,” he says, because politeness and respect from her is something to be encouraged. She’s been making such progress. “I appreciate it.”
Beau snorts and actually steers her horse away by a foot or so. “Don’t go getting soft on me, man. I’m not that much of an asshole.”
“I know you’re not. And I do appreciate--”
“Okay, gonna stop you right there.” Beau lifts a hand, palm forward. “Before we start getting into feelings and all that, I’m going to just slide back that way, and we can both walk away from this conversation feeling better about ourselves. Deal?”
Fjord grins, warmth flooding his insides. “Deal.”
“Great. Awesome. Nice talk.” Beau coughs into her fist, and looks around, and then tosses a thumb over her shoulder. “So I’m just going to go. Yeah. Later!”
She jerks the reins and abruptly curves her horse away, a nicker of irritation rising from John before she manages to turn him away and back toward the cart.
Well, that had gone pretty well, all things considered.
Fjord grins and starts to whistle a jaunty tune.
Today is a fine, fine day.
~
Nott twists her jaw as Caleb absently adjusts the tapestry around his shoulders. "The weirdos are being weird again," she whispers.
Caleb's lips twitch toward a smile. "Ja. I have noticed."
"Why do you think it is this time?" Nott asks as Molly and Yasha start to ride side by side, their voices too low for Nott to catch any of the words.
A quiet swish precedes the turn of a page. "Probably because they've found out about Fjord and Mollymauk," Caleb murmurs, his gaze entirely focused on the book. When he gets like this, Nott knows he's only giving her about ten percent of his attention.
She squints. "What about them?"
"That they're, you know..." Caleb shrugs and clicks his tongue pointedly.
Realization strikes Nott all at once. "What!?" It's not a shriek, but it's a near enough thing.
"Ja. For quite some time now."
Nott's hands scrub at her face. "That's--"
"--none of our business, but also, they deserve their privacy, don't you think? Well, perhaps not Mollymauk as he seems to have no cares for what's private or not, but Fjord certainly."
"Well, I guess, but I'm just curious." Nott can't believe she's never noticed. Usually, she's more observant than this. But how did Caleb even notice? "I thought they were friends, you know."
Caleb marks his place in the book and folds it in his lap. "I'm sure they are friends, but they're also... more." He scratches his cheek, scraping away a stray smear of mud. "It is a nice thing, I think, and we shouldn't, eh, begrudge them it, yes?"
"I'm not grudging anything. It's just... it's just weird." Nott throws up her hands. "I mean, it's Molly and Fjord. Isn't that like, I dunno, incest or something?"
"They're not related, Nott."
"We don't know!" she declares with a huff. "Molly doesn't know who his parents are. He's two years old!"
Caleb stares at her with that long, long stare she's learned to mean he's gathering his patience somehow. "I... do not think incest is an issue," he says quietly.
Nott holds up her hands. "Fine. Fine. Okay. But we're all family, right? Kind of? So it's still weird." Her hands drop into her lap and she idly tucks one bandage back into the others. They come loose so easily.
"Ja. A little bit." Caleb pinches his fingers together. "But you know, they are happy. And I think, overall, that is a good thing. Especially for people like us."
"It is a good thing!" Nott says, and she grins, always happy when Caleb doesn't cringe away at the sight of her smile. "I'm not saying it's not, I'm just saying, you know, it's weird."
"Well, we are a bunch of weirdos."
"True." Nott sighs and pulls out her never-ending flask. "I guess it's okay then. Should we... talk to them about it?"
"No. No, I think if it becomes something they want to talk about then, yes, we should let them talk about it, but no need to bring it up on our own." Caleb's cheeks turn a soft pink.
Nott shrugs. "Okay. Whatever you think is best, Caleb."
Horse hooves catch her attention. Nott's gaze wanders, and she watches Fjord ride up alongside Molly, while Yasha tries to catch up to Beau. Words are exchanged. Molly laughs. Fjord rubs the back of his head.
"Maybe they're the sequel," Nott says as she tilts her head and watches. "You know, to that dirty book."
Caleb smiles and opens his book again, steadying it on his lap. He jostles with the cart. "Maybe one day we can write it and sell it in Chastity's Nook."
"Tusk Love 2! By Caleb Nott. It'll be a bestseller I'm sure. Fjord is very handsome." Nott pauses and considers. "Molly's all right."
"Attractiveness is a matter of opinion, but yes, I do think we can find an audience for such a book. Smut is, well, smut is very popular.”
Nott laughs and digs into her pouch, pulling out a few strips of pocket bacon she’d stolen from Beau earlier, when Beau was trying and failing to flirt with Yasha.
“Nott, might I ask you a question?”
“You can ask me anything, Caleb,” she says around the bacon.
Caleb tilts his head and pauses, as if choosing his words carefully, before he asks, “If it were Beauregard and Yasha, would you still find their sexual relationship weird?”
"Of course! It would just be weird in a different way is all. Because Yasha's scary!" Nott takes a swig of her liquor, wiping the back of her hand over her mouth. "I suppose Beau's scary, too, but Yasha is a whole different kind of scary. You saw what happens when she wakes up on the wrong side of the bed! And then, sometimes she's not here, and can you imagine how much Beau would mope when she's not here?"
Nott shivers a little. "Can you imagine a moping Beau? We'd all be miserable." She shakes her head. "No, I say romance has no place in an adventuring party. None!" She nods firmly.
Caleb gives a quiet huff of a laugh. "All right, my friend. I understand." He pats Nott on the shoulder. "But also, it's a bit too late. What's done is done."
"I'll get over it," Nott says, grudging. Actual grudging this time. She takes another swig to wash down both the bacon and the mental image of a lovesick Beau. “It’s just something else to get used to around here.”
“Indeed it is.” Caleb curls over his book, hair absently falling over his forehead and into his face. He’s lost in the arcane text moments later, and Nott could possibly prod him out of it, but she needs him smart, needs him to learn.
She’ll leave him be, tucked into Molly’s tapestry, with Frumpkin around his neck.
Nott’s gaze wanders to Fjord and Molly, still riding side by side. They’re talking, she can tell that much, but otherwise there’s nothing about that them to make it obvious they’re sharing a bed, and… other things. She’s not a very good detective if she hasn’t noticed by now.
Clearly, she’s going to have to pay better attention from now on.
*
Universe: Critical Role, Campaign Two, Episode 23, post Labenda
Characters: Mollymauk Tealeaf, Yasha, Fjord, Jester Lavorre, Caleb Widogast, Nott the Brave
Rating: K+
No warnings.
Description: Truth will out, as it always does, and everyone has a thing or two to say about the not-so-secret couple in the Mighty Nein.
It’s not cold, per se, but it’s definitely on the lower end of chilly. Mollymauk tucks his tapestry tighter over his shoulders, and laments the fact he’d been smart enough to purchase tents and build this divine cover for their wagon… but not smart enough to buy warmer clothing. But then, what other clothing could he have found as glorious as this?
Not much.
He adjusts his hold on the reins, the horses steadily clopping forward. Fjord and Beau ride ahead with Yasha alongside, holding WC’s reins. Behind him, Caleb focuses on that strange stone he’s been concentrating on for the past few days, and Nott is once again tempting fate by trying to make acid. Kiri’s napping and Jester…
Jester is climbing into the seat beside Molly with a grin on her face that doesn’t bode well for his sanity. Not that he’s all too sane to begin with.
“So!” Her tone is absurdly cheerful for the cold. Then again, she has expressed a resistance to it time and time again. She bobs toward him, brushing their shoulders. “What’s it like?”
Molly blinks. “You’re going to have to be a bit more specific, darling,” he drawls. This seems to be Jester’s mode of operation, he’s noticed. She often leaps right into a conversation as though she’s already started it in her head, and hasn’t realized she never spoke aloud.
“Being with Fjord, duh.” Jester rolls her eyes.
Having always had a casual relationship with the truth when it’s not so important, Molly gives no sign that her words shoot straight to his heart. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Jester narrows her eyes at him. “You’re lying!”
“You’re lying!” Kiri chirps behind her.
Ah, yes. The ever present commentary from the peanut gallery. This ought to be interesting.
“I’m not stupid. Or deaf,” Jester continues. She leans in and half-whispers, “You guys aren’t very quiet, just so you know.”
Molly barks a laugh before he can stop himself. “He’s going to be so embarrassed.” He digs into his pocket, glad he’s started following suit with Beau and keeping a few pieces of bacon stashed inside.
“I know!” Jester giggles and leans against his side, which Molly has to admit, is rather welcome right now. It’s fucking cold out here. “And then he’s going to blush, and he’s super-cute when he does that. Have you ever seen it?”
Molly grins around a bite of bacon.
Jester smacks her forehead with her palm. “What am I thinking, of course you have.” She eyes his bacon before leaning back and digging out a sad pastry from what seems to be an endless supply. “What makes him blush? You can tell me. I won’t tell anyone. Traveler’s promise.”
“Can. Not so sure I should,” Molly says.
He takes a few moments, chews and swallows, watches the road in front of them, the steady clop-clop-clop of the horses. Beau’s just elbowed Fjord in the side for some reason. Fjord’s rubbing over his armor because it probably hurt.
“By the way, very impressed,” Molly says as he tucks the bacon back into his pocket. “Kind of thought you’d be a little more… well...” He tilts his head left to right, makes the jewelry jingle, hoping he doesn’t have to spell it out. It’s awkward enough as it is.
“Oh.” Jester nibbles on the pastry, magically mended to something far less rotten. “Well… he’s Fjord, and you’re you, and yeah, okay, I’m pretty jealous, but I’m not mad, Molly.”
Molly rolls his shoulders, tries to ease the strain in his muscles. It’s hard work, steering horses. Harder still when your seat has got all the comfort of a rough, wooden board. Probably because it is one.
“Ah,” he says. “Good to know then. So instead you’re supportive, I take it?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” She blinks up at him, genuinely confused if Molly has to guess, and well, she’s got him there.
Molly supposes Jester only gets jealous if the interest comes from outside the Mighty Nein.
“No reason.”
“You guys aren’t very quiet, just so you know,” Kiri pipes up, following it with a coo and chirp as she bundles down into the warm clothes Jester bought her.
Behind them, Caleb has moved from that weird rock to one of his books, lips muttering to himself as he reads. Nott’s intently focused on her vial, and that she hasn’t spilled yet is something of a miracle. Ahead of them, Beau and Fjord have moved a bit further forward. Yasha’s slowed down, but Molly’s not worried. She probably found a pretty flower or something.
She’ll catch up. She always does.
“So,” Jester says, dragging out the vowel. “Come on. Tell me.” She clutches his arm, getting pastry icing all over his tapestry.
It’ll take ages – or a very heavy downpour – for that to wash out.
Molly lifts his eyebrows and leans in close, without taking his eyes from the road. “It’s magical,” he says.
“Really?” Jester jumps up, and Molly has to move back at the last second to avoid getting clipped by a shoulder to the jaw. “I knew it!” She pumps a fist into the air.
Molly chuckles and leans back. “No, I’m just fucking with you,” he says. “It’s sex, sweetheart. It’s dirty and wet and messy and--”
“--sounds pretty fucking magical to me,” Jester interjects with a knowing look. She pops the rest of the pastry into her mouth and stares at her sticky fingers.
“Right. Forgot who I was talking to for a second there.” Sometimes, Jester really throws him for a loop. He peers at her. “Seriously? Not at all upset?”
“Nope!” She pops the syllable and licks her lips clean before starting to work on her fingers. “Tell me more then. Like… does he taste like the ocean?”
Molly snorts. “Usually semen does.”
“Not always,” Jester drawls with a roll of her eyes. “There are different flavors.”
“Got me there. And I really don’t want to know how you know that.” Molly glances over his shoulder. Yasha’s caught back up, a small smile on her face as she twirls a petite flower in her fingers.
Good for her.
Jester bobs a little in the seat and leans forward, gripping the forward edge. “It’s kind of obvious, isn’t it?”
“Which is why I don’t want to know.”
“You’re avoiding my question, Mollymauk,” Jester informs him, her tone a mixture of singsong and rebuke, somehow both at once.
Ahead of them, Beau makes a wild swing at Fjord who steers his horse out of the way, their laughter carrying back. Beau attempts to kick him, but he’s out of reach. Fjord holds up a hand, and Beau shakes her head, hissing at him.
Molly would give anything to be a fly buzzing in the middle of that conversation.
“It’s not really a question, is it?” Molly asks absently. “It’s more of an idle curiosity.”
“It’s a question,” Jester insists, and pokes him in the shoulder, though he barely feels it through the thickness of the tapestry. “A very important one.”
“It’s magical!” Kiri peeps and climbs onto the seat, wriggling between them with all the determination a tiny bird child can muster. Which is quite a lot.
“See! Even Kiri agrees with me, don’t you, Kiri?” Jester sweeps Kiri into a hug, and the kinku squeaks with surprise, feathers floofing out.
“Oh, gods. She’s going to remember every bit of this conversation, isn’t she?” Molly groans. He doesn’t embarrass easily, but Kiri has such a talent for repeating the wrong thing at the absolute wrong moment. Something he enjoys seeing others suffer for, but not so much himself.
Jester laughs. "Of course she is."
"Yes, I am very sweet," Kiri parrots.
Molly sighs and gathers up the reins, handing them in Jester's direction. "Why don't you and Kiri take the reins for a bit? Give me a chance to take a breather."
"Really?" Jester pops up with glee and almost snatches the reins out of his hands. "Come here, Kiri. Let me show you how to drive a cart."
"It's magical!" Kiri declares as she ducks under Jester's arm and coos excitedly.
Molly stands up, with care since the road is still rather bumpy, and straddles the seat to step back into the cart. "Good girl." He kisses the top of Jester's head. "Have fun now."
He looks up, catches Yasha's attention, and gestures her over, pointing at the extra horse in her possession. Yasha nods and trots over. Molly picks his way through the cart to the lip on Yasha's side, shrugging off the tapestry as he goes.
"Hold on to this for me, Mr. Caleb," he says as he dumps the tapestry on top of Caleb's head.
He doesn't wait for a reply, but leaps over the edge onto WC's saddle once the horse is close enough. The tip of his foot catches on the cart, but he manages not to take an embarrassing face-first tumble into the hoof-stirred mud. Small favors.
Yasha hands him the reins once he steadies himself, and they exchange a smile. Molly glances back at Caleb to see what's become of his tapestry, but the wizard's only stirred enough to tuck the folds of it tighter around his body.
Nott's cleaned up her chemistry set and has scooched closer. She's got a bundle of trail rations in her hands, and she's trying to feed them to Caleb. He eats absently, opening his mouth when she presses something to his lips, but otherwise not fully engaging in it. It was weird at first, but Molly's gotten used to the way Caleb gets completely enraptured by his books.
It's pretty adorable.
"Everything okay?" Yasha asks as Molly situates himself and sets his horse to match Yasha's pace.
"Oh, yeah. Just needed a break, you know." He squirms pointedly. "Saddle is only slightly more comfortable than wood."
Yasha nods slowly. "And doesn't come with, uh, probing questions about your sex life?"
"That, too."
They laugh. Well, Molly does. Yasha has more of a quiet chuckle, but her eyes sparkle, and the corners of her mouth lift up, and it's really quite enchanting.
"Not that I've ever been shy about my sex life, mind," Molly says as looks over the landscape, keeping a watchful eye for bandits or brigands or possibly anything of worth.
"But this is different," Yasha says.
Mollymauk tilts his head. "Well. It's. Hm." He considers. "You may be right." He squints as he runs a gamut of possibilities before he smacks the heel of his palm against his forehead. "What am I saying? Of course, you're right. Yasha is always right. It's one of your many, many charms, my dear."
"Not always," Yasha says, quietly, barely audible over the horses.
Molly tips his head in deference. "Often enough."
Yasha sighs and adjusts her grip on the reins. Toilet gives a little nicker, so she pats her on the mane. "Well, Molly... are you happy?"
"Why wouldn't I be?" It's an odd echo of Jester's reply earlier, only his is far less genuine.
Yasha gives him a knowing look, the one that seems to peer straight into his soul at times. His Molly-soul, not his whoever he used to be soul. "You know what I mean."
Molly scrubs the back of his head. "Well, you know, it's easy. There aren't any expectations from him. I can be me, be myself, and it's not an issue. Which is pretty weird, let me tell you. Humans usually have these... expectations about monogamy."
"Fjord's not all human."
"Yeah, but he was raised human. That's the difference." Molly waggles a finger at her. "Anyway, yeah. So there's that. And I think that's a good thing, a nice thing. So. I guess I am. Happy, that is."
Yasha smiles at him, soft and warm. "I'm glad."
"Me, too."
Yasha pauses and takes in a slow breath. "Well, you know, also I'm glad. Because I never know when I have to, you know, go away again. And I just want to make sure that you... you have someone looking out for you. Because you can be terrible, sometimes, at taking care of yourself."
Molly chuckles. "Yes, I suppose I can be. I'll try to be better though. In the future. As best as I can be."
"That's all I want. I mean, I know we don't know what's going to happen, and things happen..." She pauses, a dark shadow entering her eyes, her hands tightening on the reins. "Things happen we can't prevent. But we can try, right?."
"We can certainly try," Molly agrees and gestures toward the open countryside to their right. "We can also try and keep an eye on our surroundings."
Yasha chuckles. "Yes. That we can do."
Ten minutes is far too long for Beau to be quiet. She'd ridden up next to him, and Fjord's been waiting for her to talk. Her face has gone through a series of expressions he can't begin to identify, and he's a bit concerned as to what nonsense is going to come out of her mouth. Or what weird advice she's going to need.
Finally, Beau clears her throat, shifts in the saddle, and says, "So." She pops the word, purses her lips together, gives him a sidelong look. "You and Molly."
Fjord groans internally. This is not the conversation he wants to have right now.
"Beau," he starts, "I really don't think--"
"Just answer the question, man," Beau says and holds up her hands, nearly dropping her reins. "I'm not here to judge." She jiggles her shoulders. "Okay, maybe I'm judging a little, but only because it's Molly." She shakes a finger at him.
Fjord sighs.
In the long run, this will be less painful if he just goes for the truth now. "Yes," he says.
"I fucking knew it." Beau pumps a fist in the air, and her horse whinnies. She has to pat her neck to get her to calm down.
"You happy?" Fjord grunts.
"Actually? Yeah." Beau grins, and there's something sharkish in the gleam of her teeth.
Fjord twists his jaw. "Feel better now? Feel like the answer solved something?"
"Well, it won me five gold so..." Beau winks. "You know, there's that."
Fjord's eyes widen. "You bet on me!?" he demands, and he's not sure if he's offended.
No. He's sure. He's pretty damn offended. He's not particularly fond of people making jokes on his behalf.
"Only a little one." Beau pinches her fingers to demonstrate.
"With who?" he demands.
"Jester." Beau grins as if she's proud of herself. "She thought you'd be too embarrassed to admit it."
Fjord whips around in the saddle, glaring at the cart behind them, where Jester's sitting next to Molly and chattering about something. "That little..!" He huffs. There will be retribution. Swift and fierce.
"So..." Beau rides a bit closer and clears her throat again. "What's that like anyway?"
Fjord stares at her. He bounces a little in the saddle and has to glance ahead to make sure there aren't any catches in the road.
"No, wait," Beau blurts out, and shakes her hands. "Don't tell me. I don't wanna know. That's two too many dicks in that mental image."
Fjord snorts a laugh before he can help himself. Beau looks absolutely distraught. Her nose wrinkles.
"You sure?" he asks, feeling like it's his turn to make someone here uncomfortable. "Because you know, he does this thing with his--"
"Ugh. No. Stop!" Beau jerks an elbow toward him, faster than he can see or react.
Fjord grunts as it slams into his side, felt even through the thickness of his armor. "Ow."
"Just making sure you shut up now."
"Maybe you ought not be asking questions you don't want to know the answers to then," Fjord says with lifted eyebrows.
"Yeah. I see your point." Beau gives him a crooked grin. "But I guess... congratulations are in order? I mean, it's still Molly so I don't know how lucky that makes you."
Fjord sighs. “Beau...”
She grins and socks him on the shoulder. “Just kidding! Mostly.”
Ow.
Fjord bears it this time, though his arm radiates with pain, and his hand goes a little numb for a second. “You know, you don’t have to keep pretending,” he says. “I know you actually like Molly.”
“Who’s pretending?” Beau goes stiff in the saddle, abruptly upright and narrow-eyed. “He’s an annoying asshole. But then so am I. It works out.”
Sometimes, Fjord can’t tell when Beau’s serious and when she’s not. It’s certainly a work in progress.
“Can you just get the teasing over with so we can move on already?” he prompts, eyes planted on the endless, empty horizon. Hupperdook needs to be in front of them like right now so he can escape from this conversation.
Beau sucks air through her teeth. “Uh.” She scratches her chin. “Look, man, I’m sorry. Like, I want to tease you, but now I feel like I shouldn’t, because I’m sensing a little tension, so no. Not gonna tease you.” She holds up her hands before wrapping them back around the reins. “You’re happy. I guess he’s happy. That’s all that matters.”
Fjord blinks.
“I… thank you, Beau. That’s mighty good of you,” he says, because politeness and respect from her is something to be encouraged. She’s been making such progress. “I appreciate it.”
Beau snorts and actually steers her horse away by a foot or so. “Don’t go getting soft on me, man. I’m not that much of an asshole.”
“I know you’re not. And I do appreciate--”
“Okay, gonna stop you right there.” Beau lifts a hand, palm forward. “Before we start getting into feelings and all that, I’m going to just slide back that way, and we can both walk away from this conversation feeling better about ourselves. Deal?”
Fjord grins, warmth flooding his insides. “Deal.”
“Great. Awesome. Nice talk.” Beau coughs into her fist, and looks around, and then tosses a thumb over her shoulder. “So I’m just going to go. Yeah. Later!”
She jerks the reins and abruptly curves her horse away, a nicker of irritation rising from John before she manages to turn him away and back toward the cart.
Well, that had gone pretty well, all things considered.
Fjord grins and starts to whistle a jaunty tune.
Today is a fine, fine day.
Nott twists her jaw as Caleb absently adjusts the tapestry around his shoulders. "The weirdos are being weird again," she whispers.
Caleb's lips twitch toward a smile. "Ja. I have noticed."
"Why do you think it is this time?" Nott asks as Molly and Yasha start to ride side by side, their voices too low for Nott to catch any of the words.
A quiet swish precedes the turn of a page. "Probably because they've found out about Fjord and Mollymauk," Caleb murmurs, his gaze entirely focused on the book. When he gets like this, Nott knows he's only giving her about ten percent of his attention.
She squints. "What about them?"
"That they're, you know..." Caleb shrugs and clicks his tongue pointedly.
Realization strikes Nott all at once. "What!?" It's not a shriek, but it's a near enough thing.
"Ja. For quite some time now."
Nott's hands scrub at her face. "That's--"
"--none of our business, but also, they deserve their privacy, don't you think? Well, perhaps not Mollymauk as he seems to have no cares for what's private or not, but Fjord certainly."
"Well, I guess, but I'm just curious." Nott can't believe she's never noticed. Usually, she's more observant than this. But how did Caleb even notice? "I thought they were friends, you know."
Caleb marks his place in the book and folds it in his lap. "I'm sure they are friends, but they're also... more." He scratches his cheek, scraping away a stray smear of mud. "It is a nice thing, I think, and we shouldn't, eh, begrudge them it, yes?"
"I'm not grudging anything. It's just... it's just weird." Nott throws up her hands. "I mean, it's Molly and Fjord. Isn't that like, I dunno, incest or something?"
"They're not related, Nott."
"We don't know!" she declares with a huff. "Molly doesn't know who his parents are. He's two years old!"
Caleb stares at her with that long, long stare she's learned to mean he's gathering his patience somehow. "I... do not think incest is an issue," he says quietly.
Nott holds up her hands. "Fine. Fine. Okay. But we're all family, right? Kind of? So it's still weird." Her hands drop into her lap and she idly tucks one bandage back into the others. They come loose so easily.
"Ja. A little bit." Caleb pinches his fingers together. "But you know, they are happy. And I think, overall, that is a good thing. Especially for people like us."
"It is a good thing!" Nott says, and she grins, always happy when Caleb doesn't cringe away at the sight of her smile. "I'm not saying it's not, I'm just saying, you know, it's weird."
"Well, we are a bunch of weirdos."
"True." Nott sighs and pulls out her never-ending flask. "I guess it's okay then. Should we... talk to them about it?"
"No. No, I think if it becomes something they want to talk about then, yes, we should let them talk about it, but no need to bring it up on our own." Caleb's cheeks turn a soft pink.
Nott shrugs. "Okay. Whatever you think is best, Caleb."
Horse hooves catch her attention. Nott's gaze wanders, and she watches Fjord ride up alongside Molly, while Yasha tries to catch up to Beau. Words are exchanged. Molly laughs. Fjord rubs the back of his head.
"Maybe they're the sequel," Nott says as she tilts her head and watches. "You know, to that dirty book."
Caleb smiles and opens his book again, steadying it on his lap. He jostles with the cart. "Maybe one day we can write it and sell it in Chastity's Nook."
"Tusk Love 2! By Caleb Nott. It'll be a bestseller I'm sure. Fjord is very handsome." Nott pauses and considers. "Molly's all right."
"Attractiveness is a matter of opinion, but yes, I do think we can find an audience for such a book. Smut is, well, smut is very popular.”
Nott laughs and digs into her pouch, pulling out a few strips of pocket bacon she’d stolen from Beau earlier, when Beau was trying and failing to flirt with Yasha.
“Nott, might I ask you a question?”
“You can ask me anything, Caleb,” she says around the bacon.
Caleb tilts his head and pauses, as if choosing his words carefully, before he asks, “If it were Beauregard and Yasha, would you still find their sexual relationship weird?”
"Of course! It would just be weird in a different way is all. Because Yasha's scary!" Nott takes a swig of her liquor, wiping the back of her hand over her mouth. "I suppose Beau's scary, too, but Yasha is a whole different kind of scary. You saw what happens when she wakes up on the wrong side of the bed! And then, sometimes she's not here, and can you imagine how much Beau would mope when she's not here?"
Nott shivers a little. "Can you imagine a moping Beau? We'd all be miserable." She shakes her head. "No, I say romance has no place in an adventuring party. None!" She nods firmly.
Caleb gives a quiet huff of a laugh. "All right, my friend. I understand." He pats Nott on the shoulder. "But also, it's a bit too late. What's done is done."
"I'll get over it," Nott says, grudging. Actual grudging this time. She takes another swig to wash down both the bacon and the mental image of a lovesick Beau. “It’s just something else to get used to around here.”
“Indeed it is.” Caleb curls over his book, hair absently falling over his forehead and into his face. He’s lost in the arcane text moments later, and Nott could possibly prod him out of it, but she needs him smart, needs him to learn.
She’ll leave him be, tucked into Molly’s tapestry, with Frumpkin around his neck.
Nott’s gaze wanders to Fjord and Molly, still riding side by side. They’re talking, she can tell that much, but otherwise there’s nothing about that them to make it obvious they’re sharing a bed, and… other things. She’s not a very good detective if she hasn’t noticed by now.
Clearly, she’s going to have to pay better attention from now on.
