Tarnished (Silver)
Jun. 1st, 2009 08:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dracoqueen22My first ever dive into the Bleach fandom was a oneshot called Tarnished (Silver) a character piece from Ichimaru Gin's POV. It was written not long after the end of the Soul Society arc and has some spoilers, but doesn't reference much beyond the betrayal that everyone knows about. It's first person POV.
Tarnished (Silver) goes into Ichimaru's mind as he explains the reasons behind his defection, with some direct relation to the source material. I borrow heavily from Kenpachi's observation that Gin is one of the few Shinigami that are truly afraid to die, and branches out from there.
Gin begins by stating all the things that he is, and isn't. He explains what he thinks others believed of him, and his relationship with both Matsumoto and Kira. He describes what motivates him, most of all, his fear in dying and what it means to him. He fears being forgotten above all things. That what he has fought for, trained for, will have meant nothing in the end. That his strength is meaningless. Most of all, Gin fears losing meaning in his life.
He identifies himself by the things that he is, what he has become, and wonders if it means anything. Even in death. He doesn't want to be reborn as a human. He doesn't want to lose that effort, to lose the Ichimaru Gin he is and has become. And he believes fully that by following Aizen he will live forever.
It is pretty short, at only three pages, and there is much more that could be added to it now that more of the series has been seen some three years later. But I'm fond of the way it is now and occasionally, I still get reviews and favorites for it.
As the first fanfiction, it is not as good as my others, but it is the diving board. From there, I branched off into many others. I claim thanks to my beta, Lady Azar, for pushing me to write this. Ichimaru Gin is her favorite character and I wrote the character piece for her.
Tarnished (Silver) goes into Ichimaru's mind as he explains the reasons behind his defection, with some direct relation to the source material. I borrow heavily from Kenpachi's observation that Gin is one of the few Shinigami that are truly afraid to die, and branches out from there.
Gin begins by stating all the things that he is, and isn't. He explains what he thinks others believed of him, and his relationship with both Matsumoto and Kira. He describes what motivates him, most of all, his fear in dying and what it means to him. He fears being forgotten above all things. That what he has fought for, trained for, will have meant nothing in the end. That his strength is meaningless. Most of all, Gin fears losing meaning in his life.
He identifies himself by the things that he is, what he has become, and wonders if it means anything. Even in death. He doesn't want to be reborn as a human. He doesn't want to lose that effort, to lose the Ichimaru Gin he is and has become. And he believes fully that by following Aizen he will live forever.
It is pretty short, at only three pages, and there is much more that could be added to it now that more of the series has been seen some three years later. But I'm fond of the way it is now and occasionally, I still get reviews and favorites for it.
As the first fanfiction, it is not as good as my others, but it is the diving board. From there, I branched off into many others. I claim thanks to my beta, Lady Azar, for pushing me to write this. Ichimaru Gin is her favorite character and I wrote the character piece for her.
