dracoqueen22 | [TF] Scars of Yesterday

Scars of Yesterday
Chapter Twelve

Sideswipe woke to an insistent tapping on his cheek. He groaned and tried to swat at the nuisance, but it avoided his sweeping hand and returned to poke at him some more.

"Stop it, Sunny."

The nuisance giggled. "It's me, silly." Laserbeak poked at his cheek again. "Wake up! It's the day of the festival and you're missing it!"

The lump of swaddled blankets beside Sideswipe barely stirred. "Why so early?" Sunstreaker asked without emerging from his cocoon.

"Why not?" Laserbeak laughed and settled on Sideswipe's shoulder, peering down at him. "Can't you hear it?"

Sideswipe paused and listened. Sure enough, he could pick up the distant sound of music, floating up from some unknown location. Probably the main foyer. There wasn't really anywhere else for a band to set up, except maybe Drift's dojo, and the music would be louder if that was the case.

"I didn't realize it was an all day thing," he said as he rolled over on his back, shifting Laserbeak to a perch on his chest. She's all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, practically vibrating with her enthusiasm.

"Yep!" Laserbeak chirped and kneaded at his clavicle with her blunt talons. "And best of all, there's no work! Everything necessary is covered by volunteers, but for the most part, it's an off day for everyone."

The lump of blankets rustled as Sunstreaker turned away from them, only the gold of his crest peeking from his cocoon. "Then I'm going to get more sleep."

"And miss all the fun?" Sideswipe poked the mound.

It hissed at him.

Sideswipe recoiled and looked at Laserbeak who shrugged. "The real fun doesn't start until after dinner, so I guess if Sunny wants to sleep in, he can," she said.

“Well, I’m not,” Sideswipe declared as he sat up, Laserbeak tumbling into his lap. “I’m going to go see what all the fuss is about.”

“Have fun,” Sunstreaker mumbled.

Sideswipe rolled his eyes, and scooping Laserbeak under his arm, slipped out of his and Sunstreaker’s cubby. They’d opted to sleep in Soundwave’s nest last night, as they did most evenings, because it felt safer. Sideswipe supposed they were too used to sleeping around a lot of harpies.

Behind him, Sunstreaker didn’t move.

The nest itself was otherwise empty. Sideswipe set Laserbeak down at the table and peeked into the communal basket, rummaging around for something to serve as breakfast.

“Where is everyone?” he asked around a mouthful of pear.

“Frenzy and Rumble are helping set up. Buzzsaw is with Soundwave who’s with Liege. I’m not sure where Ravage is.” Laserbeak swung her legs as she tapped her chin. “Probably keeping an eye on Vortex. He likes to stay busy.”

Sideswipe nodded and wiped pear juice from his chin. "It's okay if I wander around?"

"Sure!" Laserbeak beamed up at him. "Want some company?"

"Not this time, bitlet." He pressed a kiss to her cheek to ease the sting of the rejection. "I wanna try it by myself for once. Be brave, yeah?" It’d been almost four weeks since they’d arrived. It was time.

Disappointment flickered in her eyes, but she nodded. "Okay, but don't push yourself too hard. It's fine if you need to come back and hide."

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Sideswipe snagged another pear from the basket and winked at Laserbeak. “See you later, sweetness.”

“Bye!”

Laserbeak’s cheerful chirp followed him out the door.

It’s a rare occasion that Sideswipe got to go anywhere on his own. Usually, Sunstreaker was stuck to him like a burr, and usually, Sideswipe didn’t mind. They’d never really been separated, and Sideswipe felt more comfortable with Sunstreaker beside him. But living here in Kaon, Sideswipe’s started to wonder if maybe it was okay if they did things without each other.

After all, Laserbeak and Buzzsaw weren’t always together. Frenzy and Rumble stuck pretty close to each other, but then, they’d both recently suffered a trauma, so that made sense. Even so, they weren’t always together.

Sunny would probably object, but Sideswipe thought maybe it was time they learned to be apart. At least a little bit. Sideswipe loved his brother with every bit of his being, but there was nothing wrong with wanting a little space sometimes, right?

Sideswipe followed the music to the railing and looked down at the main foyer. It was a bustle of activity with at least a dozen harpies clustered below, setting up a stage, tables, decorations, et cetera. Lively music poured from speakers Sideswipe knew were powered by solar batteries, and a couple tables were already heavily laden with breakfast pastries which the working harpies paused to peruse in between tasks.

Sideswipe chomped on his pear and watched the harpies below, their conversation, their smiles, the way they worked together as if they'd been doing so for years. It was still a novel concept to him, the idea of harpies who worked together and not against each other, who wanted to support one another, rather than fight over bits of food or the chance to rut whoever they thought was prettiest.

He didn't see Vortex, but Skids was off in the corner with a solid black harpy who looked vaguely familiar. Was he the one who'd let them out of their cell initially? Hard to say. Skids was smiling, and he looked healthier than the wreck Sideswipe had last seen, so at least being here was good for him. The black harpy kept touching his arm, and Skids didn't seem to mind.

In fact, there was a lot of touching going on, now that Sideswipe looked for it.

Had the harpies in this place always been so touchy-feely? So obvious with their public displays of affection and he was only just now noticing? There was a scent in the air, too. Subtle but noticeable, the thick and pungent scent of rising rut, beneath the other odors Sideswipe had gradually gone nose-blind to.

He supposed this was what an oncoming mating season smelled like in a place where harpies were actually allowed to be themselves.

It was a bitter odor back at the fighting pit. It was mixed with blood and the reek of waste as the humans forced them to fight in the midst of rut, larger harpies violent with their need, and smaller harpies struggling to fend off their larger foes, only to fail. Couplings were as violent as the bouts, and the humans cheered and jeered in equal measures.

The pear turned to ash in Sideswipe's mouth.

Early on, he and Sunstreaker had not been as skilled as they were now. They hadn't been able to fend off the larger harpies. Sideswipe's first time had been face down in the dirt, the taste of blood in his mouth, and the clamp of teeth on the back of his neck. It hurt, but not as much as he wanted it to, his body easing the way without his permission.

Small favor, he supposed.

Sideswipe gripped the half-eaten pear. He curled his hand into a fist, felt the bite of his talons against his palm, and grounded himself on the present sting of it, rather than the echoes of dark memory. That past was behind him. He and Sunstreaker were safe now. Safe here.

No one would force them to mate ever again, if Laserbeak was to be believed, and Sideswipe wanted desperately to believe her.

A scrape of talons over the woven floor dragged Sideswipe from his thoughts. He tucked into himself defensively, jerking toward the noise.

Ratchet stood there, hands raised to show he meant no harm, and Sideswipe relaxed. He liked Ratchet. The healer was gruff in tone, but his touches were always clinical and caring.

"Where's your other half?" Ratchet asked.

"Taking advantage of a lazy morning in." Sideswipe managed a lazy grin and lounged against the rail, trying to pretend he hadn't just fought off a wave of panic.

Ratchet chuckled. "I don't blame him. Though I'm impressed he could sleep through all the noise." He eyed Sideswipe before approaching the rail, though he kept a respectable distance between them. "Are you two looking forward to the festival?"

"Curious at least. It'll be our first," Sideswipe said. He fiddled with his pear, talon shaving small bits of it off to flutter down to the ground. "We're still not really sure what to expect."

"Revelry. Food. Noise." Ratchet grunted, sounding a little perturbed. "Far too much rutting."

Sideswipe's belly swooped. He made a non-committal noise. "Because mating season is pretty much right now."

"Unfortunately." Ratchet's sour tone was actually comforting. "Will you and Sunstreaker consider other partners?"

"No." Sideswipe didn't have to think about the answer, though for a moment, Soundwave's image floated at the back of his mind. He waved it away. "Is that going to be a problem?"

Ratchet shook his head and leaned on the rail, looking down at the preparations. "Not at all. Refuse anyone who asks, and if someone is stupid enough to press the issue, let me know. I'll handle it."

"I can take care of myself. Both of us can," Sideswipe pointed out.

"I'm sure, but you shouldn't have to." Ratchet sighed, his shoulders sinking. "We want you to feel safe here. If that means clawing someone who isn't taking no for an answer, do it. You won't be punished."

Sideswipe chewed on that concept. Soundwave had already said as much, and Sideswipe had wanted to believe him, though it sounded too good to be true. They could refuse without having to fight? They weren't required to defend themselves against other interested harpies? They could just say 'no' and walk away?

They wouldn't be punished for refusing.

"Sure," Sideswipe said. He supposed experience would tell.

"Good." Ratchet pushed himself back up and dug around in the pouch slung about his waist. "I know you and Sunny are already mated, so unless you two are ready for eggs, make sure you start taking this."

Sideswipe blinked as Ratchet shoved a box into his hands. He peered inside and found dozens of tiny balls of some kind of herb. They carried a grassy scent, with a bitter spice underneath.

"And this is...?"

Ratchet scowled. "That you don't know horrifies me." He tapped the box. "You take these, both of you, once a day, and neither of you will end up with a bitlet. Starting today."

"Huh. They'd never really worried about that. If we had a hatchling, all the better. More for them to sell," Sideswipe said.

A look of intense emotion took over Ratchet's face, and Sideswipe wasn't sure how to interpret it. Rage and pain and sadness all at once. "Have you--"

Sideswipe shook his head, cutting him off. "Nah, neither of us did. We were the lucky ones."

"Lucky," Ratchet echoed with a strangled voice. He dragged a palm down his face and sighed. "Listen, youngling, if you ever need someone to talk to, you know where to find me."

"Won't you be busy for mating season?" Sideswipe asked with a grin. Ratchet was single, he knew this much, but surely he had a lover to occupy him during this time? He was attractive enough. Someone must have invited him.

"Not too busy for you and your brother if you need anything," Ratchet said with a grunt. "Besides, I have to watch out for all the fools around here. I'll be available."

"I'll keep that in mind," Sideswipe said. He looked into the box, warmth nestling in his core that Ratchet cared enough to do this. "Thanks, Ratchet."

Ratchet managed a smile. "Anytime, kiddo." He glanced over the railing and shook his head. "They're going to bring out the fireberry wine, I just know it."

Sideswipe chuckled.

Ratchet left and Sideswipe tucked the box under his arm. He'd take it back to Sunny with some lunch and an explanation. He peered at the preparations below, wondering if the huge cask on Roadbuster's shoulder was the aforementioned fireberry wine.

Wait.

Sideswipe squinted down below, only to draw back with a scowl. Starscream's pet human was there as well. Sideswipe couldn't remember its name. He hadn't wanted to be introduced, and Starscream knew better than to bring it by to meet Sideswipe and Sunstreaker.

They wanted nothing to do with any humans, no matter how Starscream tried to reassure them that his pet was one of the 'good ones'. As far as Sideswipe was concerned, there were no good humans. Just ones who hadn't managed to be cruel yet.

Sideswipe's stomach churned.

He turned away from the railing, and opted to go fetch some food and force his lazy brother out of the nest. It was a much better choice than going down there and interacting with that human.

~

Sunstreaker woke to kisses and a chill from stolen blankets. He grumbled and tried to roll away, but the mouth was relentless, and Sideswipe breathed soft laughs into his ear.

"Wake up, sleepy head," he crooned.

Sunstreaker growled.

"You can't sleep the whole day away," Sideswipe complained, nipping his ear. "Come on. I brought food, and something Ratchet says we have to take so neither of us end up with an egg in our belly."

"What's the point of a lazy day if I have you to annoy me?" Sunstreaker sighed, but he rolled into Sideswipe's embrace, and the eager mouth seeking quick kisses.

Sideswipe nestled into him, one knee pushing between Sunstreaker's, fingers clever as they traced familiar, comforting lines. He radiated heat, like a furnace, and Sunstreaker wasn't at all surprised that Sideswipe seemed to be heading into the mating rut first. He was always first, much to Sunstreaker's consternation, and though they didn't have any proof, Sunstreaker suspected he'd been first laid and hatched, too.

"You smell so good," Sideswipe breathed, nosing into his neck, nipping at the thinner down over his throat. "This is going to be the first time we'll have privacy for this."

Sunstreaker threw an arm over Sideswipe and let him tangle their bodies together, despite the heat and his squirming. "Is it going to make a difference really?"

Sideswipe snorted. "Nope. Except that I don't have to share you with anyone else. You're all mine." He licked over the bite in the crook of Sunstreaker's neck and shoulder before pressing his teeth against it, not to bite, but to set them in familiar grooves.

Sunstreaker shivered, heat stirring in his groin. "Feeling possessive this morning?"

"Always," Sideswipe breathed, leaning in with enough pressure Sunstreaker could feel his teeth, a mark that has long since scarred over, since Sideswipe had been diligent in biting him over the years.

"Something happen?" Sunstreaker asked.

Sideswipe grumbled something against his throat and scratched over Sunstreaker's belly, talons carding carefully over his featherdown. "Mating season," he mumbled, nosing into the crook behind Sunstreaker's ear and resting there. "Gonna be lots of singles around here wanting to get a taste of you. I won't let them."

A tiny chill of dread settled at the base of Sunstreaker's spine. "What do you mean?"

"Not like that." Sideswipe licked behind his ear and nibbled on it. "Ratchet said we can say no. We shouldn't have to fight for it. But we're gonna get offers."

"Then we say no." Sunstreaker rolled his eyes and rested one hand at the nape of his brother's neck. "Unless there's someone you want...?" Was it guilt making Sideswipe so suddenly possessive?

"Just want you," Sideswipe said, a bit too quickly for it to be an entire truth.

Sunstreaker didn't understand other harpies, but he understood his brother. There might not have been anyone they liked when they were kept by the humans, but things were different now. They'd met decent and good harpies. They'd made friends. They could finally see the beauty in others.

Sunstreaker couldn't blame Sideswipe if his eyes had wandered. Sunstreaker's own had admired a time or two.

"I know you want me," Sunstreaker said, rocking against his brother where Sideswipe's plumping di-- clava, Ratchet said to call it a clava-- nestled in the cradle of his hips. "But if there's someone else we both want, I don't see why we can't have them together."

Sideswipe made a non-committal noise.

It wasn't an answer.

"Do you want me to tell you who I've been thinking of first?" Sunstreaker murmured.

"Yes," Sideswipe said, then quickly corrected himself, "No. I don't know. I don't want to ruin us."

Sunstreaker nudged at Sideswipe until he convinced Sideswipe to look at him. "If the humans couldn't do it, nothing can," he said, and dragged Sideswipe into a kiss, gentle at first, then with teeth, the press of his fangs against Sideswipe's bottom lip a subtle promise. He rocked up against his brother, and Sideswipe rolled down against him, their bodies moving together in soft motions.

It wouldn't do much, but it was familiar and comforting. It was pleasure for the sake of, and something they rarely had the chance to indulge in when they'd been held captive. It was too intimate, too raw, too precious for others to see.

"I've thought about Soundwave," Sunstreaker whispered, so quiet it wouldn't go any further than Sideswipe's ears. "I've thought about watching him fuck you, about kissing his scars, about how gentle he'd be."

Sideswipe breathed a whimper and clutched at him. "Not fair," he murmured. "I want to see him fuck you, too."

Sunstreaker chuckled and bit at the curve of Sideswipe's jaw, nibbling down to the underside, and the tiny bite he'd left in the crook below Sideswipe's ear. "I want to eat you out while he rides your face."

Sideswipe shivered. His talons left pinpricks against Sunstreaker's feathers. "I want to suck him off while you fuck me."

"And I want him between us," Sunstreaker whispered, his core throbbing with warmth. "I want to make him feel so good he won’t know which way is up."

Sideswipe groaned and clutched at him. "Okay, you got me. I want all that, too. I've been thinking about Soundwave a lot." He buried his face against Sunstreaker's chest and sighed, "You always see right through me."

"Of course I do."

"But not this time," Sideswipe said after a moment. He sucked in a deep breath and pushed upright, looking down at Sunstreaker. "I want this mating season to be all about you and me for once."

Sunstreaker cupped his face, scrubbing the pad of his thumb over Sideswipe's cheek. "He may not even want us."

Sideswipe shrugged and leaned his head into Sunstreaker's palm. "Maybe. Maybe not. But as long as I have you, I'll think I'm pretty lucky."

"Sap."

Sideswipe grinned. "Don't tell anyone."

"It's our secret." Sunstreaker pushed up, snagging a kiss, before he abruptly grabbed Sideswipe by the middle and rolled them over, leaving Sidewipe in the nest and Sunstreaker free to snag the basket of goodies Sideswipe brought for him. "And now I'm hungry."

Sideswipe scrubbed the heel of his palm over his groin, the swell of his clava impatiently poking from his sheath. "You're a tease."

Sunstreaker rolled his eyes. "You'll get plenty of that after our heat starts," he said around a mouthful of fruity granola.

"True!" Sideswipe perked up, and grinned. He scuttled over to lean against Sunstreaker's side and rifle through the goodies he'd brought. "Wanna go for a flight in a bit? Feels like it's been a while since we stretched our wings."

Sunstreaker arched a feathery brow. "Are you going to be able to fly with that thing?" he asked, pointedly looking down at Sideswipe's very much alert clava.

Sideswipe nipped his ear. "I was hoping to convince you to take care of it for me. Wind drag and all that." He rubbed his face on Sunstreaker's shoulder like the obnoxious brat he was. "Please, please, please my pretty little bird?"

He never could resist Sideswipe when he looked up all pleading like that.

Sunstreaker swallowed the last bite of a plum and threw the pit back into the basket. He wiped the back of his hand over his mouth. "I'm fucking you first tonight."

"Deal," Sideswipe said without hesitation.

Sunstreaker rolled his eyes, but he still pounced and had his mouth on Sideswipe within the space of two breaths.

Sideswipe's breathy keen of appreciation made the concession entirely worthwhile.

~

It's a much disheveled Sideswipe and Sunstreaker who showed up behind Frenzy and Rumble, whom Soundwave had sent to fetch the newest additions to their flock. The two of them radiated a lazy satisfaction, however, and Soundwave wasn't surprised. They were young enough that mating season was a joy to celebrate, rather than an irritating burden.

Laserbeak giggled on his shoulder. "Maybe they should've bathed first."

"They'll miss the Tale of Adaptus if they do," Buzzsaw grumbled from Soundwave's other shoulder.

Soundwave tracked both sets of twins as Frenzy and Rumble picked a spot on the edge of the crowd, near a quick exit and far from where Starscream and his human snuggled together. Soundwave himself must remain on the dais near Megatron and Orion, who was set to offer his version of the Tale this season. He trusted Frenzy and Rumble to look after Sideswipe and Sunstreaker, and besides--

"I'm going to join them," Laserbeak said, abruptly taking off from Soundwave's shoulder before either he or Buzzsaw could offer an argument otherwise.

Buzzsaw sighed.

Soundwave tilted his head, offering a brief nuzzle to the rejected twin as Buzzsaw scuttled closer, radiating a new grump. Soundwave suspected this would happen. Laserbeak's attachment to the new members of their family had yet to dull.

"She loves you," Soundwave assured him.

"I know," Buzzsaw muttered. "And I'll have her all to myself once their heat starts. They're going to be rutting for the whole two weeks."

Soundwave chuckled quietly. "Yes, they are." Such was the fate of the young, especially now that they had found a safe place.

"At least they have somewhere private to do it now. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that nonsense," Buzzsaw grumbled. He fiddled with the clip for Soundwave's mouthguard. "Are you going to take up Drift and Perceptor this year?"

Soundwave was silent for several minutes, letting the conversation and quiet music of the gathered flock surround him. The air was thick with happiness, excitement, and undercurrents of arousal. It made the Aerie aglow with bright colors, a rainbow of emotion nearly indistinguishable.

It was one of the reasons Soundwave dreaded mating season. It always gave him such a headache.

"I have yet to decide," Soundwave said at length. It depended on the season. Sometimes, he sought comfort from those harpies he trusted not to form a bond he could not return. More often than not, he took care of his own needs. It was easier.

This was the first year Soundwave actually desired someone, and of course, it was a desire that not only was unethical, but could never be returned. Such was his luck.

Drift and Perceptor, while suitable for casual mating, were too perceptive for their own good. Soundwave didn't know if he would leave their nest without surrendering his secrets, and he wasn't ready to admit his inappropriate feelings toward his wards.

"I'd say give Starscream a shot, but he's got that human now," Buzzsaw said, and he hummed to himself, talons kneading Soundwave's shoulder as he contemplated. "None of the newcomers are good enough for you either."

Soundwave's core swelled with affection. "Some day, there may be someone you consider worthy of my affections."

"Doubtful." Buzzsaw sniffed.

No one would ever be good enough in Buzzsaw’s eyes.

Soundwave chuckled. “We shall see.” He tilted his head against Buzzsaw’s once more, only for his sibling to ruffle his feathers and stir.

“Wait. I think it’s time for the tale,” Buzzsaw said, trying and failing to conceal his enthusiasm. “We have to be quiet now. Stop talking, Soundwave.”

“Of course,” Soundwave murmured, and did a far better job of hiding his amusement. Buzzsaw would never admit how much of a romantic he was, but if Soundwave at all interrupted Orion’s retelling of the Tale of Adaptus, Buzzsaw would nip his ear.

Soundwave quieted; Buzzsaw settled. Megatron rose to center stage, lifting his arms to call for quiet and attention, and silence fell across the gathered flock.

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker paid attention as well, looking cozy and content as they cuddled one another while Frenzy and Rumble caged them in and Laserbeak sprawled across Sideswipe’s lap. The sight of their tangled bodies made a surge of affectionate warmth rise in Soundwave’s core before he could tamp it down.

For a moment, he allowed himself the fantasy that he could call that tangle of harpies his family, and it would be true for every one in the clump. Frenzy. Rumble. Laserbeak.

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker.

Soundwave breathed in and when he exhaled, let the fantasy go. Such things could not be.

“Pay attention!” Buzzsaw hissed.

Soundwave went obediently still. He could not be greedy. He already had a large family.

Besides.

It was time for the Tale of Adaptus.

***